The journey can often be filled with constant uncertainty, emotional pressure, and navigating not only medical hurdles but also societal expectations and often unsolicited advice from others which you feel you must accept to not look rude, all of which can really feel like a burden. You basically need the emotional resilience of a superhero and be able to navigate “what ifs” and the “what next” simultaneously, but we hear you. It is hard!
Just because you haven’t seen that positive result, it’s so easy to fall into the trap of thinking there’s something wrong with you when things don’t go as expected, especially with something as deeply personal as pregnancy. Allowing ourselves to feel the frustration and sadness is part of the process—it's not a reflection of failure.
The journey to conception can add buckets of stress and pressure to a relationship, especially alongside the emotional and physical challenges that often go together with it. It might shift the focus from the intimacy and connection you had before to more of a goal or planned and calculated experience. The difficulties of trying to conceive—like ovulation windows, timing, and the emotional weight of disappointments—can make things feel a bit strained. You may long for that time when intimacy was not tied up with stress, anxiety, and heartache. TTC can really put a strain on intimacy. What was once a joyful, spontaneous connection can become overshadowed by pressure, disappointment, and frustration.
The best thing you and your partner can do is relax, have fun, and enjoy your relationship without worrying or fixating on becoming pregnant. Feeling stressed and anxious can release of hormones which are obstructive and can suppress the hormones that are needed to conceive a baby.
When the pressure is on – tips for managing stress and anxiety when trying to conceive.
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Try planning in some relaxation time for both you and your partner on a regular basis. This may look different for different people, so spend some time thinking about what works for you both. It may be as simple as a daily, silent walk in the woods, as easy as a regular movie night or as lush as a late-night swim at your local gym.
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Make your relaxation time a daily ritual, if possible. If not, make sure you schedule time at least 2 or 3 times a week where you do whatever works to de-stress your body and mind.
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For some couples it can work for the woman not to disclose when she believes ovulation is most likely! This is because some men can become anxious and either lose their erection partially or entirely or may be unable to ejaculate due to this. Focusing on the importance of having sex at certain times in the month can magnify these feelings, so try to reduce this by not homing in on the importance of exact timings.
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Some activities to help release and manage stress and anxiety include meditation, yoga, Pilates, walking in the forest/nature, running, using the gym, an evening out together or with friends, a massage, a spa day, visiting friends or family, or spending time around animals and/or with pets.
